Sunday, September 13, 2009

BikeWatch 2K9

Oh hello there blog! I didn't see you come in!

18 Mile morning ride in Iowa City
Exotic Bike Count:

5 (!) tandems, three of them the elusive flat-bar variety
2 recumbents

This does not count the several dozen bicycles I saw whose handlebars soared majestically in the air, hovering around their riders' chins. These bicycles are not, at least in these climes, exotic.

Thursday, March 12, 2009

The Perfect Family

Two pieces of news that will surprise no one:

- Levi Johnston has quit the oil field.

-AND-

- Johnston and Bristol Palin have separated.

Saturday, January 24, 2009

An Excerpt from my "The L-Word" Tie-in Novella (NOT FAN FICTION!)

Evil lesbian nightclub owner Dawn Denbo stormed out of She Bar. "Curse Kit Porter and Helena Peabody!" she muttered, "I will make them pay for buying my nightclub and kind of humiliating me in front of a bunch of people!" But Dawn Denbo had not been paying attention as she walked into an alley. The alley was as dark as the soul of evil lesbian arriviste Adele Channing. Dawn Denbo walked past a dumpster, shivering with cold - or was it evil?
"BLAH!" yelled the vampire Lestat as he jumped out from behind some boxes or a parked car. "Drink from me and live forever!"
Dawn Denbo considered his offer.
"Also you can team up with me and Sonic the Hedgehog to get back at those conniving wenches from The Planet!" Lestat offered. "Sold!" replied Dawn Denbo.

AND THUS BEGAN THE SAGA OF VAMPIRE DAWN DENBO!
Look for the novella in stores as soon as I get an agent and an offer for publication and iron out some minor intellectual property issues!

Monday, January 19, 2009

Dr. House, M.D.

So last night I had a dream that I was on House, and I was a resident and was bossing around some of the new interns. The main plot was a leftist girl with some mysterious disease who kept leaving the hospital to attend protests and play folk guitar. At one point when we were following her famous actor Daniel Craig walked by on an embankment and he waved at me and I got very excited and told my fellow doctors that being a celebrity must be like being the only person in a world of dogs, because everywhere you go everyone is super-excited to see you.